LEAF zip and I wake up

It's been two weeks since I've done any jogging of substance. I didn't mean to drop the ball, but life kind of happened.
Life and weather.

You see, the day I was scheduled to do Week 5/Day 3 it was in the high 80s-low 90s here in Boston. And I, being the chump that I am, attempted to go jogging at my usual jogging time.

You know, around 10:30-11 in the morning.
It was hot. It was humid. My skin was burning in the Sun.
In my defense I did make it most of the way through the program before my vision started to swim and I wondered how I was going to get home because even walking felt like too much.

I decided to take the weekend off and hide from the heat in an air conditioned room, planning to renew my efforts the following Monday.

Then my period came a five days early. Effing body. I mean, for serious here. What the hell?!

I didn't feel great last weekend, so I basically stayed in doors, and then this weekend well...again with the weather.
I know, I know: excuses, excuses.

Though in my defense I have biked to work almost every day this week. Even in Tuesday's rain, which left me sopping wet by the time I made it home. I even biked in today, and will probably be sopping wet when I get home again, but for an entirely different reason.

I'm taking a swim test at my gym today.
Why?
Because I've signed up for Introductory Sailing Lessons through the aforementioned gym, and before they will let me near the water they want to make sure I'm not going to drown. Which, you know...fair.

So today, in a bathing suit I haven't worn in quite literally years^* I'll be tested on the following swimming related activities.

- Jump into the deep end of the pool.
- Tread water for 2 minutes.
- Swim under water for 15 feet
- Swim 100 yards (breast or crawl stroke, my choice.)

I'm going to die. I've pretty much decided.
I can do the jumping, and I can do the water tread. Those aren't my concerns.
My concerns lay in being able to swim underwater for 15 feet and swimming 4 lengths of a pool.
The former because I never did develop the ability to open my eyes underwater, so I have no idea how long I can actually stay down, and the latter because I've never swum laps before and have wee bitty arms.

It's going to be a shitshow, is basically what I'm saying.

And then on top of this? I have to some how put on a swim cap.
I haven't worn a swim cap since grade school. This, sweet chocolate Zeus this is going to be one of the most dignifying days I've had in a really long time.

And then, when all this is said and done, I get to bike my ass home.

w00t!

SO yeah, that's my evening.

I'm trying to focus on the positives:

If I pass I can go sailing on Saturday!
If I fail, I'll be too drowned to care!

SO, I'll get back to you guys and let you know how I did. Either from this life, or the next.
Oh and remind me to tell you how I managed to join a Drinking Club with a Running Problem.




^*...but that still totally fits. GO ME!

Whats my LEAF again?

Well now that was a shitshow of EPIC proportions.
So very very demoralizing.

But, as this is the year where I'm giving myself permission to fail, I'm doing my best not to dwell on the fact that I'm a crap swimmer.

Instead I'm going to tell you the story of how I met the Boston Hashers last night, and ended up being initiated into the group without running.

I was at Bukowski's last night having dinner and drinks with a friend of mine from High School. As we were exiting the restaurant we happened to spy a shirtless guy jogging with a small dog on a leash. I remarked on how I felt bad for the little dog with all the running, when two ladies in bras and garters jogged by.

My friend and I watched with confusion. Okay, that's not entirely true, I watched with confusion, she took off like a shot proclaiming loudly, THESE ARE MY PEOPLE!

My confusion grew. At the next stop light there was a guy on a bike asking me if I wanted to swap shoes with him so I could run too. Yeeaaah, no. I'm not swapping shoes with a stranger, especially not when the shoes I'm wearing are my silver Docs.

So I jogged along as well as I could until we got to the Beer Stop. That's when introductions were made, and I found myself in the Bag Car with some guy who's name I don't remember.

It...was interesting.
I joined the walkers and we ended up at the Hong Kong where there was beer and pizza and an initiation rite. Apparently now I'm part of the group.

Adventure!