skygiants: Utena huddled up in the elevator next to a white dress; text 'they made you a dress of fire' (pretty pretty prince(ss))
skygiants ([personal profile] skygiants) wrote2025-12-12 05:05 pm

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The Ukrainian fantasy novel Vita Nostra has been on my to-read list for a while ever since [personal profile] shati described it as 'kind of like the Wayside School books' in a conversation about dark academia, a description which I trusted implicitly because [personal profile] shati always describes things in helpful and universally accepted terms.

Anyway, so Vita Nostra is more or less a horror novel .... or at least it's about the thing which is scariest to me, existential transformation of the self without consent and without control.

At the start of the book, teenage Sasha is on a nice beach vacation with her mom when she finds herself being followed everywhere by a strange, ominous man. He has a dictate for her: every morning, she has to skinny-dip at 4 AM and swim out to a certain point in the ocean, then back, Or Else. Or Else? Well, the first time she oversleeps, her mom's vacation boyfriend has a mild heart attack and ends up in the ER. The next time ... well, who knows, the next time, so Sasha keeps on swimming. And then the vacation ends! And the horrible and inexplicable interval is, thankfully, over!

Except of course it isn't over; the ominous man returns, with more instructions, which eventually derail Sasha off of her planned normal pathway of high school --> university --> career. Instead, despite the confused protests of her mother, she glumly follows the instructions of her evil angel and treks off to the remote town of Torpa to attend the Institute of Special Technologies.

Nobody is at the Institute of Special Technologies by choice. Nobody is there to have a good time. Everyone has been coerced there by an ominous advisor; as entrance precondition, everyone has been given a set of miserable tasks to perform, Or Else. Also, it's hard not to notice that all the older students look strange and haunted and shamble disconcertingly through the dorms in a way that seems like a sort of existential dispute with the concept of space, though if you ask them about it they're just like 'lol you'll understand eventually,' which is not reassuring. And then there are the actual assignments -- the assignments that seem designed to train you to think in a way the human brain was not designed to think -- and which Sasha is actually really good at! the best in her class! fortunately or unfortunately .... but fortunately in at least this respect: everyone wants to pass, because if you fail at the midterm, if you fail at the finals, there's always the Or Else waiting.

AND ALSO all the roommates are assigned and it's hell.

Weird, fascinating book! I found it very tense and propulsive despite the fact that for chapters at a time all that happens is Sasha doing horrible homework exercises and turning her brain inside out. I feel like a lot of magic school books are, essentially, power fantasies. What if you learned magic? What if you were so good at it? Sasha is learning some kind of magic, and Sasha is so good at it, but the overwhelming emotion of this book is powerlessness, lack of agency, arbitrary tasks and incomprehensible experiences papered over with a parody of Normal College Life. On the one hand Sasha is desperate to hold onto her humanity and to remain a person that her mother will recognize when she comes home; on the other hand, the veneer of Normal College Life layered on top of the Institute's existential weirdness seems more and more pointless and frustrating the further on it goes and the stranger Sasha herself becomes. I think the moment it really clicked for me is midway through Sasha's second year, when spoilers )
newredshoes: Woman in religious ecstasy, surrounded by art implements (<3 | patron saint)
my love, I am the speed of sound ([personal profile] newredshoes) wrote2025-12-08 01:11 pm

Future's — made of — temporary insanity

Okay, I really thought my crafting hyperfixation of the month was going to be beading on a loom. Earlier this year, I picked up a book about it, thanks to a need to spend over $10 at a thrift store, and then a few weeks ago, I saw a plastic bead loom at Michael's and nabbed it. Obviously from there, I realized the kit was not sufficient for My Vision, so I headed back to Michael's and dropped a truly silly amount on beads and weird needles. Have I started beading, which I'm excited to do? No, obviously first I have to clean off my crafting table, which involves SO much organizing, purging and Gingko-wrangling, so she doesn't eat or destroy any of the above.

Then, over Thanksgiving, YouTube slammed me with an unexpected interest. [youtube.com profile] yooon_ie lives in Chicago, apparently close enough to the West Loop Goodwill that she can stop by often enough to pounce when she finds a vintage Coach bag in the wild. Her parents are a cobbler and a tailor, according to her telling, and she's got all kinds of amazing skills and know-how for taking these designer objects in tragic condition and rehabilitating them in a flash.

I am fascinated. It's related to the emotional satisfaction one gets watching a pet groomer rescue a terribly matted stray from neglect, though with less body horror. There are so many videos out there; I definitely spent more than one evening just working my way through everyone's shorts, which all follow the same pattern with the same ASMR. And so, the urge rises: I want to experience this! I want to find a mistreated designer bag for $8.99 in a back rack at Goodwill and treat myself to Real Luxury Like They Used to Make! I've never been a bag girlie or even a girly girlie. This, like my sudden realization that makeup is fun, actually, is all very new on my end.

Here is the problem: Because it is maximum load USPS season, everything I'm splurging on is very slow to come in the mail. I can spend the money and absolutely nothing about it is real because it is taking two weeks to get here. I became briefly insane last Sunday and decided it was worth it to buy a new bag from Coach Factory, and the delivery date keeps dropping back, and like!! Then I remembered DePop was a thing and immediately stayed up until 2 AM this Saturday bookmarking candidates (because I spent the weekend exploring varying thrift stores and coming to understand that thrifting is a persistence predator's game). Yesterday I tried out the "make an offer" button and then the seller accepted basically immediately?? So I DO have a glorious vintage '90s minimalist Coach purse (Swinger in black!) coming my way, for too much money STILL because of fees, but Amazon has not come through on my freaking saddle soap/horsehair brush/Leather CPR order, so obviously nothing exists until I can see it and hold it in my hands!!! And even then!!!!!

I am but a humble public media journalist, my poor bank account cannot take this ADHD object-permanence nonsense. All of this absolutely did start because my therapist poked me in the forehead and reminded me that it is good, in fact, to treat yourself and that it is hard to do things like date (more on that another time!) when you feel like a feral gremlin all the time. (That said, I do have a story in mind about this bag rehabber community that I hope to publish for Mother's Day, so maybe I can write it off for my taxes at some point.)

All of this does fall a bit into perspective given the real ballgame I'm warming up for: This morning, I spent an hour with a realtor who's going to help me, fingers crossed, Buy a Condo in the next few months. Speaking of money that absolutely isn't and cannot be real to me. But she's got sassy realtor energy and I am really excited to get started For Real on this search. ✶
camwyn: Me in a bomber jacket and jeans standing next to a green two-man North Andover Flight Academy helicopter. (Default)
camwyn ([personal profile] camwyn) wrote2025-12-08 01:40 pm
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(no subject)

Just read a NYT headline about how it looks like the Supreme Court is prepared to hand Donald Trump more power to fire whoever he wants.

Also just accidentally knocked over a box of satin pins, did not realize what I had knocked over, and stepped down. Barefoot.

Guess which I'd rather repeat.
skygiants: Hohenheim from Fullmetal Alchemist with tears streaming down his cheeks; text 'I'm a monsteeeer' (man of constant sorrow)
skygiants ([personal profile] skygiants) wrote2025-12-07 07:44 pm
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(no subject)

The other movie I saw recently -- not on a plane! but in a real theater! -- was Guillermo del Toro's Frankenstein (do I need to spoiler cut this? well, let's be safe) )
genarti: Ocean water with text "no borders, no boundaries." ([misc] no boundaries)
genarti ([personal profile] genarti) wrote2025-12-06 03:29 pm
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New story in anthology -- out now!

I have various longer posts to make (job transition news, a write-up of a truly hilarious theater experience, etc), but in the meantime, a quick post to let you know that the Murderfish anthology, which I have a story in, is now officially out and available for purchase!

Murderfish is, as it says on the tin, an anthology of stories about murderous fish. (Its predecessors were Murderbirds and Murderbugs, which cracks me up every time I think about it.) Each story features a different kind of sea life, as well as very cool art of them all! I haven't read all the rest yet, but I'm excited to, and it looks like there are a whole lot of genres involved. My story, "In Sheets of Seaweed," is about a woman in the simultaneously privileged and precarious position of being a prince's mistress, who dreams increasingly of sharks calling to her; I called it my "shark selkie" story for a long time before I thought of a title, and in fact after. I'm very fond of this story, and I'm delighted it's found a home at last.

The ebook is available here and the paperback here. The audiobook is coming soon, but hasn't been unveiled quite yet.

Those are both Amazon links, though not affiliate ones. If you're like me and prefer to avoid buying things through Amazon, full support, but for the moment that's all I have. I've asked if it'll be available on other sites as well, and I'll update when I get an answer.
skygiants: Moril from the Dalemark Quartet playing the cwidder (composing hallelujah)
skygiants ([personal profile] skygiants) wrote2025-12-06 01:33 pm
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(no subject)

I am home! with my own cats! and my own computer!! This is very exciting because I have spent most of the last two weeks traveling, including last Monday when I spent about 24 hours total stumbling through different airports getting rerouted onto different flights before finally getting to achieve my dearest wish at that point, Be Horizontal.

In the course of that extremely long day I watched two French movies on planes:

Au revoir là-haut/See You Up There )

La venue de l'avenir/Colors of Time )